As adults, we play out and process the childhood pain that’s almost too immeasurable to feel through a hologram of experiences. As adults we are able to talk about “bad” experiences we had but it is rare to see people write about what’s truly underneath these adult experiences.

Writing about their violent alcoholic mother, the belt their father whipped them with, the sexual abuse they encountered as children while their mother knew and did nothing, the constant being told they were worthless, the oppressive restriction of growing up inside extremist religion- these are almost too vulnerable to be seen in, and when shared many times they are guarded and used for attention.

These wounds create the circumstances we find ourselves in over and over and people use the experiences as adults people to work through what is not healed.

It’s a catharsis to be seen and acknowledged for a safe kind of victimhood.

One that feels righteous.

Even if it’s riddled with our projections.

One where they don’t have to be seen in the vulnerability of what occurred but rather in a seemingly powerful position of overcoming something as brave and strong.

This is part of the healing process.

To reclaim a sense of power for a person struggling with powerlessness.

But many times the inner child is still protecting the people who caused the harm while finding a convenient enemy they can take all that pain and aim it at.

They deeply want the love of the parent.

They want resolution with the person but not necessarily with the wound.

When alchemy does not occur, the old wounding is projected onto a new situation and then played out with the new image.

That’s the enemy now and the object of the pain.

We see this running rampant in our culture at the moment.

Why? Because pain is an addiction.

It’s addictive to have a nemesis.

It’s addictive to hold onto our wounds.

Wounds are deeply familiar.

For many of us they have been more familiar than happiness or joy.

Our original wounds just morph and change faces until we have the opportunity to alchemize it.

It’s the same energetic with a different veil.

That’s literally how this dimension works.

Our instinct is to dominate it, but domination sadly doesn’t alchemize anything.

This particular gate is the gate of total annihilation.

This initiation is allowing it to take the wound and everything that we became in the name of its protection.

And only then we are left with Truth.

In the space of the eternal emptiness.

Where there are no hooks left and nothing to destroy.

That is the spot that we avoid the most because the power in that location is immeasurable and then we must be responsible for it.

The entertainment our enemies provide dissolves and we pass through into a new field of creation.

As adults, we play out and process the childhood pain that’s almost too immeasurable to feel through a hologram of experiences. As adults we are able to talk about “bad” experiences we had but it is rare to see people write about what’s truly underneath these adult experiences.

Writing about their violent alcoholic mother, the belt their father whipped them with, the sexual abuse they encountered as children while their mother knew and did nothing, the constant being told they were worthless, the oppressive restriction of growing up inside extremist religion- these are almost too vulnerable to be seen in, and when shared many times they are guarded and used for attention.

These wounds create the circumstances we find ourselves in over and over and people use the experiences as adults people to work through what is not healed.

It’s a catharsis to be seen and acknowledged for a safe kind of victimhood.

One that feels righteous.

Even if it’s riddled with our projections.

One where they don’t have to be seen in the vulnerability of what occurred but rather in a seemingly powerful position of overcoming something as brave and strong.

This is part of the healing process.

To reclaim a sense of power for a person struggling with powerlessness.

But many times the inner child is still protecting the people who caused the harm while finding a convenient enemy they can take all that pain and aim it at.

They deeply want the love of the parent.

They want resolution with the person but not necessarily with the wound.

When alchemy does not occur, the old wounding is projected onto a new situation and then played out with the new image.

That’s the enemy now and the object of the pain.

We see this running rampant in our culture at the moment.

Why? Because pain is an addiction.

It’s addictive to have a nemesis.

It’s addictive to hold onto our wounds.

Wounds are deeply familiar.

For many of us they have been more familiar than happiness or joy.

Our original wounds just morph and change faces until we have the opportunity to alchemize it.

It’s the same energetic with a different veil.

That’s literally how this dimension works.

Our instinct is to dominate it, but domination sadly doesn’t alchemize anything.

This particular gate is the gate of total annihilation.

This initiation is allowing it to take the wound and everything that we became in the name of its protection.

And only then we are left with Truth.

In the space of the eternal emptiness.

Where there are no hooks left and nothing to destroy.

That is the spot that we avoid the most because the power in that location is immeasurable and then we must be responsible for it.

The entertainment our enemies provide dissolves and we pass through into a new field of creation.