I am deep in my alchemical practice at the moment.

The mold and the CIRS which I’ve chosen to abandon as my central focus were an invitation to go in with laser sharp precision into the most unbearably painful locations.

These are not mental stories.

To the physical energy that got stuck and could not safely be released.

With the wrong framework one would say I’m going through a tough time.

For a practitioner, the invitations are accelerating.

Invitations come with CAPACITY

Readiness

Ripeness

You can let thing rot or you can burn them

Different seasons for different medicine

For me, the way I alchemize things is literally walking directly into a fire and sitting there

Unlike my friend @carolynelliott_ _ whose path is to fuck her pain til she giggles (best path C 🤣)

there is no kink for me

No pleasure

I just burn

I feel everything in the fire

I allow the flashbacks

The screams

The terror

The desire to kill

The grief

The disbelief

Until it’s clean

I am Earth born of Fire

I am no wet log or whispy reed

I am not a deep ocean

Or even a Hurricane

I’m a fiery earthquake

And pyroclastic flow

I was mourning the lack of gentleness that has existed in my life the other day

For just a moment

Because the truth is that my path in this life was custom designed for the precise gifts and medicine I meant to live in this life

And it’s fire

It has always been fire

There is nothing gentle about fire

Even a match

I consider sometimes I am here to alchemize the fear of burning alive for Truth for the entire collective

Yes I will sit in that

No you cannot harm me with it

I will consume it

I will be consumed by it

And every time I rise from those ashes

It will set us all free

The fear of being possessed and consumed by our pain and darkness

Leaves most of our wounds unseen and unmet and unloved

You don’t caress a woman screaming In hysterical rage

You don’t stroke her hair

You don’t tell her how logical her position is

You get the fuck out of her way

You witness it

And you say NOTHING

Because there is nothing to say

This is beyond the inner child

Beyond the story

Beyond the trauma

It’s Truth unfolding in the most fundamental sense of the word

And once the fire burns the shell

And blasts the crust

The soft flowing lava inside can pour

And a new fluid opening is created

This is my practice

Do not confuse it for yours

The capacity I have in my body to burn in this way is rare and it is a lifelong practice

So … do not try this at home

But you can begin to turn into the center of your pain and look it directly in the face

To feel what you can while remaining open

To gently stop when you can’t hold it anymore

And slowly more and more will move until it all flows out

And when it does you will have the capacity to fill it with love

I am deep in my alchemical practice at the moment.

The mold and the CIRS which I’ve chosen to abandon as my central focus were an invitation to go in with laser sharp precision into the most unbearably painful locations.

These are not mental stories.

To the physical energy that got stuck and could not safely be released.

With the wrong framework one would say I’m going through a tough time.

For a practitioner, the invitations are accelerating.

Invitations come with CAPACITY

Readiness

Ripeness

You can let thing rot or you can burn them

Different seasons for different medicine

For me, the way I alchemize things is literally walking directly into a fire and sitting there

Unlike my friend @carolynelliott_ _ whose path is to fuck her pain til she giggles (best path C 🤣)

there is no kink for me

No pleasure

I just burn

I feel everything in the fire

I allow the flashbacks

The screams

The terror

The desire to kill

The grief

The disbelief

Until it’s clean

I am Earth born of Fire

I am no wet log or whispy reed

I am not a deep ocean

Or even a Hurricane

I’m a fiery earthquake

And pyroclastic flow

I was mourning the lack of gentleness that has existed in my life the other day

For just a moment

Because the truth is that my path in this life was custom designed for the precise gifts and medicine I meant to live in this life

And it’s fire

It has always been fire

There is nothing gentle about fire

Even a match

I consider sometimes I am here to alchemize the fear of burning alive for Truth for the entire collective

Yes I will sit in that

No you cannot harm me with it

I will consume it

I will be consumed by it

And every time I rise from those ashes

It will set us all free

The fear of being possessed and consumed by our pain and darkness

Leaves most of our wounds unseen and unmet and unloved

You don’t caress a woman screaming In hysterical rage

You don’t stroke her hair

You don’t tell her how logical her position is

You get the fuck out of her way

You witness it

And you say NOTHING

Because there is nothing to say

This is beyond the inner child

Beyond the story

Beyond the trauma

It’s Truth unfolding in the most fundamental sense of the word

And once the fire burns the shell

And blasts the crust

The soft flowing lava inside can pour

And a new fluid opening is created

This is my practice

Do not confuse it for yours

The capacity I have in my body to burn in this way is rare and it is a lifelong practice

So … do not try this at home

But you can begin to turn into the center of your pain and look it directly in the face

To feel what you can while remaining open

To gently stop when you can’t hold it anymore

And slowly more and more will move until it all flows out

And when it does you will have the capacity to fill it with love