Let me give you a quick lesson in energetics.
I teach this in depth in my program DEVOTION.
When we are descending through the layers of our external to internal world, pockets of unprocessed trauma are kept in rooms or shells or vaults or however you would like to visualize a compartment with a hard protective casing.
The story layer is like static electricity.
You can think of it like a radio or a tv as well because the stories change but you are still on that layer.
As you descend there will be agitation. Anxiety as the therapists like to call it. But it’s not something to be soothed or fixed.
Energy is becoming available.
To DESCEND.
The rumbling of this layer is meant to help you descend and give enough energy to break through the outer crust of the vault.
When you get to the outside of the vault you will be met by something fierce and ferocious. It will spout what you confuse with “power” like a fire house and you will get so excited about this energy you will ride it back to the surface and use it….. inappropriately every time.
You will feel powerful.
But this kind of power always says fuck you.
It isn’t something to put away or behave or soothe or regulate so you seem in control.
The purpose is to unlock the room in the depths of your body that is full of a pain you would rather not look at.
The kind of pain that will make you look weak to feel.
The kind of pain that has no story but it screams of a black terror.
The kind of pain that feels like it is twisted in your tissue and your cells.
The “power” is meant to drive into this space and untangle the pain.
In the center of the untangled pain is a softness that is like melted honey.
Golden
Flowing
Quiet stillness
Expansive and loving
Connected and generous
This is a PHYSICAL experience
If you haven’t made it there, then you haven’t touched the real power
You only know this landscape if you have traveled it and it’s easy to confuse reactivity with power
Reactivity points to power.
Power in the darkness of the still untouched wound
